Motherhood is a beautiful journey filled with joy (maybe not 24/7) selfless dedication, and of course lots of love. However, as a momma, it is essential to find a balance between nurturing your children and nurturing your passions and purpose in life. But how do we do that when we’re knee-deep in that laundry pile which never seems to go down, no matter how many times a week you put a wash on? Well, in this post, we will explore 5 things you can do to discover your unique interests, reignite your passions (remember those?), and cultivate a sense of purpose beyond motherhood.
Tip 1 – Ditch the guilt:
Did you know, it’s a scientific fact that if we pursue our dreams, not only can we enhance our well-being, but we can also become happy and fulfilled versions of ourselves? This means we can show up better for our children and inspire them to lead fulfilling lives. In other words, if you feel guilty for pursuing a life of passion and purpose, take advice from Robbie Williams and Kylie Minogue – and say you’re ‘doing it for the kids’!
Joking aside, if you want to find your passion and purpose, you are going to have to ditch the guilt. And, yes, for some of us, it’s freaking hard because we are socialised to put everyone else’s needs in front of our own. Here’s how you can let go of the guilt:
- Recognize the importance of self-care: Understand that by nurturing your own needs, you are better equipped to care for your children. It’s not selfish; it’s necessary. As those airplane folks tell us, ‘Put on your own oxygen mask first, before helping others’. It’s a metaphor for real life.
- Reframe your mindset: Instead of viewing self-care as a luxury or indulgence, see it as an investment in your physical, mental, and emotional health. Remind yourself that you deserve to be happy and fulfilled
- Communicate openly: Talk to your loved ones about your desires and aspirations. Explain why pursuing your passions and purpose is important to you. When they understand where you are coming from, they are more likely to support and encourage you.
- Do the time snatch: It’s not always about carving out big chunks of time for yourself. Look for small pockets of time throughout the day to engage in activities that bring you joy, whether it’s, 5 mins here watching a Youtube video, 10 mins there practicing a hobby, or simply taking a relaxing bath for 20 mins.
Tip 2 – Embracing Self-Discovery:
If you are a stay-at-home mum and have school-aged children, chances are you haven’t heard anyone call you by your actual name in a while! Instead, you are [insert your child’s name] mum! Some days it can feel like motherhood is overshadowing our individual identity. And this is why it is crucial to reconnect with yourself in order to find your passion and purpose. Here are a few things you can do:
- Carve out ‘me time’: Set aside dedicated time for self-reflection, introspection, and exploring your interests. Even if it’s just 10 minutes a day. Get a journal and remind yourself of all the hobbies and activities you liked to do before you became a mom and all the things you would like to do in the future. Be wild and free with this (because where else do you get to be wild and free these days!)
- Assess your strengths and interests: Identify your skills and talents. Usually, the things you are good at, are the things that bring you joy. Link to MBTI coaching
- Experiment with new experiences: Step out of your comfort zone and try new things. Join clubs, take classes, or get active in your community and expand your horizons.
Tip 3 Identifying Your Passions:
Passions are the driving forces that ignite and satisfy our souls. Here’s how you can identify your passions:
- Pay attention to what excites you: observe the things you pay attention to outside of your kids. Take note of activities that make you feel energized, engaged, and alive. It could be anything from painting to cooking, writing to photography.
- Reflect on childhood dreams: Revisit your childhood aspirations and interests. Were there any dreams you never chased? (Like that one where you wanted to be the next big pop star and you’d regularly sing into your hairbrush in the mirror) It’s NEVER too late to rekindle those desires.
- Explore your values and beliefs: When thinking about you’re your childhood aspirations, you may want to think about what values those roles represented. Eg, wanting to be the next big pop star might represent the value of ‘status’, or ‘boldness’. What you wanted to be in your younger years, may give you clues to your core values and beliefs which are usually aligned with your passions. So, spend some ‘me time’ reflecting on what matters most to you and how you can incorporate your values into your pursuits. (values sheet)
Tip 4 Unleashing Your Purpose:
Finding purpose is about aligning your passions with something that contributes to a greater cause. Follow these steps to unearth your purpose:
- Understand what drives you: Reflect on the causes, issues, or challenges that make you want to make a difference.
- Combine your passions with purpose: Identify how your passions can be channeled towards making a positive impact in your community or the world.
- Start small but meaningful: Begin by taking small steps towards fulfilling your purpose. Volunteer, create awareness, or collaborate with organizations that resonate with your goals.
Tip 5 Balancing Motherhood and Personal Goals:
While pursuing your passions, it’s crucial to strike a balance between motherhood and personal goals. Here are some strategies to help you achieve that balance:
- Prioritize and delegate: Do you really have to do e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g? And those that does everything need to be done to gold standard? Identify the things that you absolutely have to do and only you can do. Then, try to delegate other tasks to trusted family members or friends or even your kids (depending on what the task is and how old they are). This could free up small amounts of time, for you to focus on your personal goals without neglecting your responsibilities as a momma.
- Create a schedule: Establish a well-structured schedule that accommodates both your family commitments and personal pursuits. Set aside specific time slots for your passions and communicate this with your family planner.
- Seek support: Build a network of support, including fellow mothers and like-minded individuals who understand the challenges and joys of balancing motherhood and personal growth.
Wrapping thing up:
Motherhood is a profound experience that has undoubtedly changed your life. But that doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice your own passions and purpose. By embarking on a journey of self-discovery, identifying your passions, and your purpose, you can find fulfillment beyond motherhood. Remember, finding your passion and purpose is not a destination; it’s an ongoing process of growth and self-reflection. Embrace the joys of motherhood while expressing your individuality, and inspire your children by showing them the power of pursuing their dreams and living a purposeful life.